A Month of Gratefulness {Day 13}

I woke up this morning thinking and feeling like I was going to have nothing to be grateful for today...It has been a really rough couple of days. I went to a great women's thingy yesterday. Right away though I was put in the fire to test what I have been learning not just yesterday, but for the past year and a half. It was intense and really hard. I found myself thinking I am a crazy person.  The conversations in my head are tough. The questions I am asking God are hard and I am not to sure I will like the answers.  ANYWAY, I have avoided starting to read this book because I knew that well, I would have to respond.  Crazy, right?  So the book is called One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are

In the first chapter alone I cried twice. I am only in the 2nd chapter, but God is slowly revealing that the best way to beat my craziness is to be thankful. So long story short, I will need to be thankful for something today just as a matter of taking a stand against the Enemy.

I am thankful for God's unfailing love and His tireless pursuit of me. He never let's me go even though I kick and scream sometimes. (ok really most of the time) A song that has been resonating with my heart recently is "One Thing Remains"  My favorite part is:

"Your love never fails, it never give up, it never gives up on me." 

At least there is one being I can depend on for loving beyond and in spite of my screw ups.

 

PS This is long, but amazing.

Trust

Sundays are such a great day for me. I love preparing to go to church. "How do you prepare to go to church? Don't you just show up?" you say. Well, for me it means getting my heart and mind in the right place. It's a place that puts me second and God first. Growing up my Dad would always play music in the morning. I guess he got me in the habit of it and now I continue it. This morning I was listening to my Wow hymns (I've been in the hymn mode lately). Two songs really hit me this morning which means God was talking to me. The first one is called "'Tis So Sweet To Trust in Jesus". The idea is that we have nothing to fret or worry about because God is trustworthy. I really struggle with this concept. I find that my life has given me some hurtful moments that I have blamed fully on God. In my heart I have decided that God is not trustworthy, yet my mind knows differently. The chorus convicted me to the utmost. "Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him! How I've proved him over and over." I began to think of all the times that God has pulled me through. I began to think how many times he has protected me from some crazy things, how he has been with me, and will be with me to the very end. (praise Jesus) He is trustworthy.
Then to continue on this thought, He showed me why He is trustworthy. I listened to the song "There is a Fountain". I am going to put the words here because they are so powerful.

There is a fountain filled with blood
Drawn from Immanuel's veins;
And sinners, plunged beneath that flood,
Lose all their guilty stains:

The dying thief rejoiced to see
That fountain in his day;
And there may I, though vile as he,
Wash all my sins away:

E'er since by faith I saw the stream
Thy flowing wounds supply,
Redeeming love has been my theme,
And shall be till I die:

After this last verse I fell to the floor in awe and praise of Jesus. In the middle of my kitchen, I sat weeping because His blood pardoned my sins. He redeemed me. I was a vile person like the prisoner on the cross next to Jesus, but just like the thief I have been forgiven because of the blood shed there on the cross. Folks, that is good news. We can live because of his death. He gave it up for us. Who in your life has done that? Who has denied himself or herself to the point of death that you may live the life of your choice? I can think of none other than Jesus. He is the constant in my life. He is the one that I can depend on. So I am going to keep trusting God even when it seems like He is untrustworthy because he has redeemed me, saved me from destruction of my own design. I came away from today knowing more of God's love for me in a very real way. My prayer for you is that you too will know that same love and experience the peace and joy that passes all understanding due to that amazing love. He loves you more than you can ever imagine and He will continue to love you no matter what you are or what you do. Nothing can change His love for you.

Love and Action

I have been really feeling the pull to start putting myself to action. Most of you know I am not one to sit still anyway, and I am not really talking about changing much in my life. It is already busy as it is with three boys, work, church, aerobics, etc.... What I am talking about is changing some of my priorities. I have found that most of what I do is surrounded by the idea that I am the most important person in the world. How I wish that was true, but the reality is there are so many people suffering here and abroad. I have been asking lately for my eyes to be open and heart the be open to see where I can love people the way God loves them. That brought me back to an old passion that once burned very brightly, orphans. I am sure that many of you know about the plight of the orphans in Africa due to Aids and Malaria. God continues to show me how is heart breaks for the "least of these". I have also been reading a book called Dangerous Surrender by Kay Warren. She has been putting to words what I have felt many times while I have been overseas. (Each time I went overseas we would visit orphans) It got me thinking about how can I be used where I am. Well, on Facebook I made a comment about it. I was so glad I did because my cousin sent me a wonderful site. It has several organizations that work with orphans. I can hardly wait to sit down and see where God will lead me.

Love Continued

I have debated whether to share this or not. I watched this video on a friends blog and wept. As my friend said I want this to prompt me to action. How can I help those who cannot help themselves?



If you watched it thanks for taking the time to do it. May God spur you to action on behalf of children like these.

Love

So I decided we were close enough to February to change the background, but it also got me thinking about love. Love is a theme that is throughout scriptures. John, one of the disciples of Christ wrote a lot about it. Here are some words from him.

"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone that loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the World that we might live through him. This is love; not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our suns. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us an his love is made complete in us." 1 John 4: 7-12

Did you hear that. It is not because of us that there is love, but because God is love. And what a demonstration of that love, sending his one son to die a most brutal death for our sakes because there wasn't a way for us otherwise to be close to God.

Thank you God for you love. May I show it in everything I do. Please forgive me when I choose to not love others. Gently remind me of your love that you so freely gave.

Fuzzy Slippers

I love the way that God knows our needs and truly cares about it. You are most likely wondering why fuzzy slippers and God go together right? Well, our family has been attending a church called Sandals for about 4-5 months now. They call themselves Sandals because the pastor was so paranoid about is gross feet he would never wear Sandals. In the attitude of Christ he chose to show his flaws and be real with others. The vision of our church is Real with ourselves, real with others, real with God. This is a very hard concept especially for people like me who do not desire to share weaknesses. Yet there are many I have and I am now responsible for sharing in order to be real and to seek help from others so that I may become more like Christ.

I say all this because this morning our group had an on line meeting. I love it. Bible study of the 21st century. We have joined together through facebook, and other online social networking, but my favorite has been tokbox. This is a way to video conference. We use it to share how God is dealing with us this week or how he is challenging us. Man have I needed this. We are looking at the life of John because he was known as the beloved disciple of Jesus. How does one become the beloved disciple of Jesus? I am learning. I long to be this close to the one who gave it all up for me. He loved so great that he chose to die so that I could live. Who does that? Anymore we can't even give up our breaks to help a fellow human. Jesus truly lived an amazing life and John was up close to see it all.

Thank you Jesus for this opportunity to join with women who want to know you in an intimate way. I pray that you will continue to challenge us through one another and show us where we need to get rid of pride and feelings that are not from you. Show us how you love us and help us to love others as you do.