Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Today I was perusing Facebook because that is who I am and found this article posted by a friend. It was so true. I find that I am at my wits end when it comes to raising children. They seem to push every button I have and then I end up doing things I later regret. Not crazy stuff, but not the things I wish. I am learning that I have to be living in God's grace before I can even get to be the parent I want. I have to be able to love them like Jesus loves me. (This is something my husband said recently) How does he love? Unselfishly, unwaveringly (is this even a word), and with lots of patience. The other thing I am realizing is that whatever I want them to learn I must be doing myself. If I want them to be generous, am I doing it? If I want them to be respectful, am I modeling it? If I want them to clean up, how does my room look? Parenting is tough. I know that I will never do it right, but praise God that He can cover all the wrongs.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
My loving husband says I have the spiritual gift of comparison. (that's not a real gift btw) I have to agree. I love to read blogs and see how many talented people there are, but the problem comes when I want to become that person as well. I begin a process of thoughts that get me depressed and sad about where I am. Some examples of this is "why can't I do that?" "Look at her, why can't I look like that?" "Her house is beautiful, why can't I make that or do that or create that?" It is in the moments that I have to STOP, and remember who God created me to be. And to be honest, I am relearning this. In the midst of work and family I have lost some of this. There are definite passions that are being awakened, but I am learning what it means to be me with all the roles that I play now. I am no where near being "arrived", but am starting to take the steps needed. Without Christ I would be nothing and have no idea where to start. GRACE is the most precious thing for me right now. He is covering all the mistakes I am making along the way and loving me for who I am now and He knows who I am going to be when I am perfected in His Presence. So there it is all laid out for you. There is so much more to share, but I think I will stop here.
Happy New Year!!!!